Was he only with me for sex

Did he just want sex? These 7 signs speak for it

You get to know an attractive man. He woos you charmingly, after which you fall in love with him. If the relationship subsequently breaks down, the realization that “he just wanted sex” usually comes too late. Because how are you supposed to know in advance whether your new acquaintance is ready to accept you as you are and to love you?

It could be that your newbie just has a fleeting sexual relationship in mind. As difficult as it may seem, you can find out exactly what he's thinking, even though you can't see inside a person.

How it works? The key to this lies in individual, often relatively inconspicuous signals. Interrelated and correctly interpreted, they make it possible for you to expose the true intentions of your gentleman. This article will explain in detail how to identify a predominantly sex-oriented intent of your new acquaintance.

I fell in love with him, but he was all about sex - what now?

Love is a strange game“It says in a well-known song by Connie Francis and there is something to it.

However, it's not that easy to find each other, to approach each other and to share everything in life, right? Even more so than it different expectations can give to a relationship.

I broke up with him because he just wanted sex!“You may have heard this statement yourself. However, if you pay attention to a few signs, you can estimate beforehand whether your dating partner is really only interested in one thing. In this way you are going against an admirer who is just one Sex relationship has in mind to understand how to arm in good time.

In a relationship, both should know the rules of the game so that neither of the parties involved is emotionally hurt. If your partner plays the game according to their own rules and you have emotions, it becomes difficult. Problems are inevitable in this case and in the end you may end up in a pile of fragments of your feelings.

Usually an attractive representative of the male sex, who is sparkling with charm, has a great job and is financially well off, is sought after by numerous women. A temptation to that some men can't resist.

If you manage to meet such a specimen, you may soon be rid of it. If, contrary to expectations, the person stays with you, you may have to share them with other women. It is important that you are aware of this and that you can part with it in good time before too much porcelain is broken.

My boyfriend just wants sex - what can I do to keep this from happening to me all the time?

Instead of constantly using the same variety "Charm stud“To fall for it, try to look for an honest and ambitious man. For someone who has both feet on the ground, has a job and is not just looking for a sex relationship.

Look for a male who knows how to talk to you and is attentive to you. Someone who values ​​having an attractive woman like you by their side.

Then there is also the chance that your partner is loyal to you and that you are one with him common future can build.

Once you have found a suitor who meets these requirements, open them up to share their feelings. By asking him to do something for you, you can carefully test his love.

Something where he can overcome himself and which probably no other man would do for you. However, it doesn't have to be an organ donation or something similarly serious. It can already count as a proof of love if your chosen one wants to introduce you to his close circle of friends or his family.

However, there is no absolute guarantee that a relationship will last a lifetime, even if the conditions are ideal.

He Just Wanted Sex - Seven Signs That Expose Him

A handsome and charming man took your heart by storm on a date. But - is your gentleman really serious or is he just looking for a sex relationship?

Here's how you can tell that your dating partner may not be really interested and just follow their hormonal instincts:

1. You don't hear from him until evening

You wait all day for a call, a Whatsapp or an email. Nothing. His cell phone is switched off and he does not respond to electronic mail from you. Your loved one finally gets in touch late in the evening, bursting with passion and wants to see you immediately, preferably in your or his apartment. Because he just wanted sex again.

If he had serious intentions as your partner, he would be in touch regularly. He would take you out to dinner every now and then and now and then he wanted to do something interesting with you.

2. He seems to be in love with himself and is very concerned about his external appearance

Admittedly, if you, as a male, attach above-average importance to your appearance, you don't have to be a notorious womanizer. He may still be able to allow real feelings.

However, the likelihood is high that this gentleman needs just as much variety in his love life as he does with his clothes. What can lead him to primarily strive for a non-binding sex relationship.

3. He is mainly focused on sex

Cuddling and smooching is still possible, every now and then you also watch a film on TV together. That was it with togetherness and communication. Because in the majority of cases your loved one wanted to get straight to the point.

For his part, if it wasn't just about sex, but also about serious feelings, he would probably seek a conversation with you. He would be willing to share his wishes and dreams and would be interested in your opinion on important topics.

4. You regularly hear suggestive remarks from him

Making charming compliments, that masters your new achievement perfectly. However, it is always about externals, such as long legs, plump bust or well-shaped buttocks. He doesn't say a word about your character traits.

How come Possibly because he doesn't really care about you and your admirer has always just wanted to have a sex relationship with you.

5. He lacks respect for you

Your crush is chatting openly with other women around you? He still has his dating profiles online and you caught him flirting on Instagram the other day? Such a man may cheat on you with the next woman who runs along.

He probably never wanted anything more than a sex toy and may not be capable of real feelings at all.

If your partner loses respect, consider ditching them before you sustain lasting psychological harm. However, if you value sex with him so much that you don't care about anything else, then enjoy the hot hours. However, be careful not to get emotionally - or sexually - dependent on him in the process.

6. He just wants a "Relationship light

You have been waiting for an opportunity to introduce your new friend to your family or parents for some time. But when the time comes, he suddenly has no time.

Have dinner with friends? Nothing! What apart from mattress sports to one Love relationship heard, is rejected, he is only interested in an exciting "Bedfellow" to have.

With you and probably with other women, the "Womanizer“A light relationship to meet his hormonal and social needs.

7. You are an achievement for him

Dating a handsome man can be exciting, but you usually pay a heavy price for it. Such a beau sometimes sees you as (sex) -trophywhich stimulates his sportsmanship, but increasingly atrophies his emotional side.

Always forgiving your affairs doesn't really help. Because such a sex relationship has nothing to do with a serious partnership, based on mutual trust and understanding for one another.

If you can manage to admit this, it means the first step out of an addiction.

The following questions in particular can provide further information:

  • Does your crush often seek eye or body contact with you?
  • Is his body language aimed at you?
  • Is he listening to you attentively?
  • Do you have other topics of conversation than sex?
  • Is your loved one nervous around you, is noticeably afraid of saying the wrong thing and readjusts their clothes more often?
  • Is he generally looking to be around you?
  • Are you treated considerately by your colleagues or friends?

You could answer all questions with a clear "Yes“Answer? In this case, your chosen one most likely has a real and moral interest in you, and not just wanted a sexual relationship.

To be absolutely sure about this, you can talk to your loved one about your future together, a possible desire for children or other common goals. Sometimes you will experience answers and reactions that you would never have thought possible.

As a woman, can I change a man's sex-related attitudes?

Men and women just don't go together“Loriot once said.

Gender-specific differences between men and women and the resulting different points of view are difficult to explain away. Regardless of whether it is about love, sex or partnership. This is a mixture of natural conditions and what has been learned from one's own and other people's experience.

Attempts were often made on the basis of attitudes and behavior Differences between men and women to explain. To date, however, researchers have not been able to conclusively prove anything. That is why the following views continue to circulate today:

  1. Men want to spread their genes through - sometimes promiscuous - sex and in this way pass on their individual characteristics and ensure the continued existence of the human species.
  2. In contrast, women are due to their natural disposition to "Nest building“And the rearing of the offspring is hormonally balanced accordingly.

Whether you believe it or not is up to you. These statements probably play a role in Loriot's quote.

In other cultures, the exchange belongs to "Sex for material supply“To a relationship with it. In this country, feelings are always in demand. If these are deep and crisis-resistant, you can see them as good prerequisites for a long-term relationship.

Frustrated because he wanted to just sex? Cheer up, you don't need to despair. This happens to both men and women and most likely each of us has already seen it.

Are all men just about sex?

No. Depending on the individual strength of character and strength of will, you can meet different specimens of the male species.

One is loyal to his partner because he feels corresponding feelings for her and simply considers this to be right. Maybe his parents set an example for him. That guy will likely be a caring partner to you and ideal as a family man.

But you can also meet men who want to live out their need for sexual variety uninhibited, regardless of the feelings of others and who mainly want to have a pure sexual relationship with women.

Also the "Golden middle“You can meet often. This kind of man gives the faithful spouse and self-sacrificing family man for years. He not only wanted sex all the time, but developed honest feelings for his partner. However, if an opportunity to cheat suddenly presents itself, you can see how he can barely resist the temptation.


If a charming heartthrob has taken your heart by storm, things can get tricky. Because if you wanted to keep a clear head in the face of hot kisses and wild emotions in this situation, it is not that easy.

Therefore: Focus on the little ones, but unique characterswhich prove that your newcomer may just want a sex relationship with you. In this case, there is no interest in you as a woman at his side or in your longings, desires and dreams.

Take the time to reflect and decide to leave, if necessary, before you are left emotionally hurt on your part. He may not have earned sex with you at all.

He just wanted sex“In order not to have to admit that in tears all the time, make your choice of men exactly.

Maybe you will soon get to know someone who is not your typical heartthrob, but has an honest character. Who values ​​you as a partner and not only wanted sex, but serious feelings cherishes for you.

True interest and real feelings are usually the best prerequisites for a long-lasting love relationship.

About the author

Simone Sauter - lovesick coach

Simone is a lovesickness & self-love coach, Amazon bestselling author and writes the largest German-language lovesickness blog From Pain To Power with over 85,000 monthly readers. She specializes in helping women to transform the pain of their lovesickness into powerful energy and thus to let go of their ex-partner, to learn to love themselves and to find the perfect partner on this basis. Her calling arose from her personal story. Before working as a lovesick & self-love coach, she worked for several years as a PR & social media manager for the world's largest online dating site and was already intensively involved with the topic of partnership during this time.